The Mystery of Edwin Drood by Charles Dickens Essay -- essays research

â€Å"It has often been remarked that woman have a curious power of divining the characters of men†(75). This quotation from The Mystery of Edwin Drood by Charles Dickens reflects the opposite of what a typical Dickensian society is supposedly based upon. In this standard society, the plot would be based around the life of a dominant male. Although the title reflects a male name, the movement in the novel is directly related to the exploits of a particular character, Rosa Bud. Fondly called Rosebud by her peers, she is the apple of every man’s eye and the envy of every woman’s. She takes control in the plot not because she evidences forceful or masculine qualities, but because the powerful characters in Cloisterham, males, are all in love or feel a kinship to Rosebud. The power is therefore transferred into her hands as a result of her ability to influence these characters through their love and admiration for her. Attending school at a nunnery, Rosa’s female friends rarely have any contact with men. Through her betrothal to Edwin Drood, Rosa is the only woman within the nunnery that has a man to court her. She is the only woman mentioned, in the nunnery, that is going to be married off to a man, not God. Rosa capitalizes on this situation by leading the other girls in the nunnery to be her â€Å"poor pets†(118). She realizes that the girls as well as the head of the school, Miss Twinkleton, who describes Rosa as her â€Å"pet pupil†(14), look at her to be the embodiment of romance because of her prospective marriage. Miss Twinkleton and the girls live their love lives through Rosa, â€Å"over her shoulder†(51). Rosa feeds into the situation by making sure that the girls are watching her and letting Edwin know that they â€Å"must get married . . . the poor girls would be so dreadfully disappointed† (17). She uses her power over Edwin, which is given through l ove and devotion to her and both of their parent’s wishes for them to be married, as a way to stay in control at the nunnery. She is the object of the gaze to all of the girls and Miss Twinkleton, â€Å"nothing escapes their notice†(18). Realizing that she is the object of their gaze, she remains in control by showing the girls what she has with Edwin from afar. The girls are under the impression that Edwin and Rosa are in a perfect relationship when, in actuality Rosa decides that they have to â€Å"pretend that you (Edwin) are engag... ...t can be said from the information gathered that Rosa tries to keep bits of information from people so that she is the only one that has all of the control. The squabble that occurs between Neville and Edwin is a result that Neville feels that Edwin does not appreciate Rosa and his â€Å"good fortune that is not by any means necessarily a result of his good merits†(60). Neville has affection for Rosa after just meeting her a few nights ago. The argument results in Neville flinging his â€Å"dregs of wine at Edwin Drood†(61). This scene reflects Rosa’s ability to take new people that come to Cloisterham and get them to instantly feel a kinship to her. She has the capacity to force Neville into â€Å"rising in a fury†(61), after just recently meeting him. The plot line in The Mystery of Edwin Drood, although written in the 19th century, reflects the life of Rose Bud. Though she does not appear to be the main character in the novel, the plot revolves around her actions and opinions. Her secrecy about certain things to different characters enables her to accomplish this. Every other character’s fascination with her makes it easy for her to make allies and create confidant, all working in her favor. The Mystery of Edwin Drood by Charles Dickens Essay -- essays research â€Å"It has often been remarked that woman have a curious power of divining the characters of men†(75). This quotation from The Mystery of Edwin Drood by Charles Dickens reflects the opposite of what a typical Dickensian society is supposedly based upon. In this standard society, the plot would be based around the life of a dominant male. Although the title reflects a male name, the movement in the novel is directly related to the exploits of a particular character, Rosa Bud. Fondly called Rosebud by her peers, she is the apple of every man’s eye and the envy of every woman’s. She takes control in the plot not because she evidences forceful or masculine qualities, but because the powerful characters in Cloisterham, males, are all in love or feel a kinship to Rosebud. The power is therefore transferred into her hands as a result of her ability to influence these characters through their love and admiration for her. Attending school at a nunnery, Rosa’s female friends rarely have any contact with men. Through her betrothal to Edwin Drood, Rosa is the only woman within the nunnery that has a man to court her. She is the only woman mentioned, in the nunnery, that is going to be married off to a man, not God. Rosa capitalizes on this situation by leading the other girls in the nunnery to be her â€Å"poor pets†(118). She realizes that the girls as well as the head of the school, Miss Twinkleton, who describes Rosa as her â€Å"pet pupil†(14), look at her to be the embodiment of romance because of her prospective marriage. Miss Twinkleton and the girls live their love lives through Rosa, â€Å"over her shoulder†(51). Rosa feeds into the situation by making sure that the girls are watching her and letting Edwin know that they â€Å"must get married . . . the poor girls would be so dreadfully disappointed† (17). She uses her power over Edwin, which is given through l ove and devotion to her and both of their parent’s wishes for them to be married, as a way to stay in control at the nunnery. She is the object of the gaze to all of the girls and Miss Twinkleton, â€Å"nothing escapes their notice†(18). Realizing that she is the object of their gaze, she remains in control by showing the girls what she has with Edwin from afar. The girls are under the impression that Edwin and Rosa are in a perfect relationship when, in actuality Rosa decides that they have to â€Å"pretend that you (Edwin) are engag... ...t can be said from the information gathered that Rosa tries to keep bits of information from people so that she is the only one that has all of the control. The squabble that occurs between Neville and Edwin is a result that Neville feels that Edwin does not appreciate Rosa and his â€Å"good fortune that is not by any means necessarily a result of his good merits†(60). Neville has affection for Rosa after just meeting her a few nights ago. The argument results in Neville flinging his â€Å"dregs of wine at Edwin Drood†(61). This scene reflects Rosa’s ability to take new people that come to Cloisterham and get them to instantly feel a kinship to her. She has the capacity to force Neville into â€Å"rising in a fury†(61), after just recently meeting him. The plot line in The Mystery of Edwin Drood, although written in the 19th century, reflects the life of Rose Bud. Though she does not appear to be the main character in the novel, the plot revolves around her actions and opinions. Her secrecy about certain things to different characters enables her to accomplish this. Every other character’s fascination with her makes it easy for her to make allies and create confidant, all working in her favor.

Journey for Truth: The Life of Sojourner Essay

The contribution of the life, philosophy, and activism of Sojourner Truth was that she was effective in preaching to the community as a freedom fighter, abolitionist, and feminist. Representing many classes of people in Antebellum United States, she was able to illuminate for others the hardships and desires of black people, the poor and oppressed, and women. As slaves, blacks had no personal freedom. They had no rights to themselves or their families, were whipped and tortured, experienced segregation and denial of citizenship, were denied salaries, and, women especially, endured the devastating agony of having their babies and children stripped from them and sold off to other arrogant and inhumane slave masters. In an effort to encourage radical change in her time, Truth took up the risky cause of making speeches against the strong forces of evil and in support of the righteous values of freedom and respect. Liberating herself and other people was not limited by class, racial, economic, or gender lines, rather she held the torch of freedom as a beacon for all oppressed people to follow, calling for empowerment of the weak, tolerance for differences, and protection for all people (Waxman, 2007). Truth was born into slavery in the late 1790s, in a more rural area outside of the bustling New York City. At the age of nine, Truth, then named Isabella, was sold by the slave master away from her parents and one remaining sibling to another New York slave owner. For nearly thirty years, she experienced a life of extremely difficult conditions, being repeatedly sexually abused and physically assaulted, and some of her children were forcibly taken from her and sold into bondage. Luckily, after the New York Emancipation Act of 1827, Truth was freed along with other former slaves of this Northeastern region, and in 1843, Truth was inspired to assume her new name and began a mission of journeying across the country as an itinerant preacher, supporting the efforts of abolitionists and feminists in the North, becoming actively involved in breaking down the slave system and pressing for the rights of all subjugated people (Mullings, 2005). Truth’s most famous speech at the Women’s Rights Convention in Akron, Ohio in 1851 is a wonderful demonstration of the strength of her ideals and the power of her words. In an excerpt from Brah and Phoenix’s 2004 article, Truth is quoted as having preached: That man over there says that women need to be helped into carriages, and lifted over ditches, and to have the best place everywhere. Nobody helps me any best place. And ain’t I a woman? Look at me! Look at my arm. I have plowed, I have planted, and I have gathered into barns. And no man could head me. And ain’t I a woman? I could work as much, and eat as much as any man–when I could get it–and bear the lash as well! And ain’t I a woman? I have borne children and seen most of them sold into slavery, and when I cried out with a mother’s grief, none but Jesus heard me. And ain’t I a woman? (p. 77) Her sharply painful and moving words, rich with truth and experience, sent tides of strength and power through the country’s movement for all levels of freedom in regard to all kinds of people. In countering tyranny with liberty, and violence with peace, Truth became an emblem of the almost suffocated soul which was able to rise up, speak out, and lend valuable energy and motivation to the essential activism of her time. In defending her womanhood, her personhood, her right to full citizenship and social inclusion, Truth demanded respect during a time when evil was easily cast down the noses of the dishonorable elite. Standing firm in her beliefs and finding power in the spirituality of goodness, Truth was able to meet eyes with her oppressors and effectively shake the foundations of a flawed system.

My Lot in Life Issues of a Stepparent

My Lot in Life: Issues of a Stepparent Part I Letter to a Friend 04 April 2014 Dear Amy, It has been a long time since we had a heart-to-heart talk, and by now you must have figured that I have a very important reason for writing this letter. I need your advice on what I should do about my stepdaughter, Jessica. I had a fight with her last night after I confronted her for bullying a classmate. She told me that I am not her real mother and that I cannot tell her what to do. You know that I love Jessica like my own. I will do everything to make her happy. I just do not understand why she would say that to me especially now that her dad is away for work most of the week. He had to accept that high-paying job in another city so that we can have enough to spend for the needs of our growing family. I thought that we had each other to turn to, but she no longer opens up to me like she used to when she was little. I do not have a clue about what is bothering her. I do not think that she is jealous with her new sister. It seems to me that the older she gets, the farther she drift s away from me. I would not have known about her classmate if the principal at her school had not asked to talk to me. She said that a mother, Mrs. Davenport, complained to her about Jessica and her gang harassing her daughter, Beth. According to Mrs. Davenport, it started when her daughter became friends with a boy named Jerome. At first I thought that it was not serious, and that the adults should not interfere. It is normal for kids to have crushes, to fight over silly things. However, when the principal described the problem in details, I was speechless. Jessica and her gang have been spreading rumors that Beth’s mother worked at a bar and had been a mistress of several men before she was finally able to get married, which of course, was not true. She added that Jessica posted on Facebook an edited picture of Beth in underwear for everyone to see, and called her a flirt. The principle told many more stories about Jessica, but at that time, my head has already stopped working. I was shocke d. I told myself over and over again, â€Å"No, that was not my Jessica.† At her age, Jessica is still a baby. She must have thought that she was in love, and that she can get Jerome to turn his attention to her by humiliating Beth. The things that Jessica and her friends have been doing are not appropriate for their age; they are very alarming. I know that to fully understand her situation, I should not merely focus at her infatuation with Jerome. I must know if anything bad happened to Jessica that made her behave that way. I must find out what it is that bothers her, or if someone is influencing her to do what she has been doing. I need to be aware if the problem is my parenting. I love her so much, and I will not let her become a delinquent. Perhaps, I should ask her dad to talk a leave from work so that, together, we can pay more attention to Jessica and the situation she is going through. I will talk to the people in her regular environment—her close friends and teachers at school. They may be able to tell me if there is anything unusual about Jessica, or if Jessica told them of a problem that she could not tell me or her dad. Most of all, I would let her know that I love her and that I will always take her side no matter what. Maybe that way she would realize that she can trust me, that I am her mother after all. My friend, you have been through this before so I figured that you could give me ideas on what I should do. Your best friend, Meg Part II Research After many years of trying my best to become a good stepmom to Jessica, I realized that she has not learned to trust me completely. The even bigger problem is that, she is involved in a bullying situation in her school, and she refuses to talk to me about it. I felt disrespected when she said that I am not her real mother when my only intention was to show her the right way. I only have her best interest in mind, but she does not allow me to be a part of her life. As per Harvey and Wenzel (2001), stepparents should not attempt to act as a substitute for a biological parent. Instead, they should aim to have a mutually acceptable relationship with their stepchild (Harvey Wenzel, 2001). It is likely that Jessica sensed my effort to become a mother to her but she thought that I planned to replace her real mom. Jessica’s biological mother died when she was six. About a year and a half later, her dad and I started dating. We waited for almost two years before we decided to get married. At first, Jessica seemed to take it lightly. She was such a sweet girl; it did not take long for me to love her. I thought that telling me that I am not her real mother is a sign of disrespect. However, Lintermans (2010) suggests that there are many reasons why a stepchild would say that to a stepparent and most of them have nothing to do with respect. This could mean that I have done something to cause Jessica to feel that way about me and that what she said was not a question of respect but of how I played the role of a mother to her. Bullying Behavior Research shows that the children living with a stepparent are more at risk of developing behavioral problems than the children living with two biological parents (Hetherington Kelly, 2002). Now I understand that I should not primarily blame myself for what is happening to Jessica. We were fine when she was younger, but I should look at the possibility that she is only beginning to feel the pressure of living with a stepfamily. The birth of her half-sister probably makes her feel that she is now an outsider. The new baby is the main reason her dad endured working far from home. Jessica is too young to understand on her own the complexity of our situation on her own. As a stepparent, however, I should have explained to her why her dad had to accept that job, and that even our family is never complete without her. Jessica and her friends were reported to have been bullying a classmate. The Child Welfare Information Gateway (2014) defines bullying as an act of using force or influence to intimidate others. I learned from the principal that Jessica and her friends have been tormenting their classmate, Beth. A young adult like Jessica normally engages in a bullying behavior to gain attention and respect (Child Information Gateway, 2014) In some cases, the perpetrators are not aware that what they are doing is wrong or how it affects their victim (Child Welfare Information Gateway, 2014). Having mentioned that, I am starting to think that Jessica only wants to get noticed—by her dad, who she does not see very often. Jessica needs his love and attention. Maybe, she told me that I was not her real mother as a way of saying that she needs her dad. Role of Parenting In a study conducted by Dr. Claire Cartwright and her peers (2009), they found that more than a third of participants reported experiencing resentment towards their stepparents for taking a disciplinary role. They felt angry when their stepparents obliged them to follow their rules. After evaluating my past behavior and decisions, I realized that Jessica has several reasons for not liking me anymore. When she turned eleven, I thought that I needed to protect her from negative influences in her environment. I demanded that she should be home by seven o’clock, limited her TV time during school days, and reported to her dad about almost every instance that she was with her friends. I thought that by doing that, I was able to make her feel that she matters a lot to me. Dr. Cartwright went further with her study by talking about a young girl who was close to her stepfather and spent a lot of time with him until she became a teenager (2009). At the interview, the girl admitted that she was grateful for the support given by her stepfather, but they began to have conflict over his attempts to discipline her as she reached her teenage years (Cartwright, Fansworth, Mobley, 2009). This is the same situation Jessica and I have been going through. We liked each other very much before, but things changed between us when, from being a friend, I turned into a disciplinarian. Even when my intentions are good, my methods are simply not the type that Jessica would appreciate. Dealing with the Issue Harvey and Wenzel (2001) argue that if a stepparent decides to remain emotional about the situation, he or she may hold the child responsible for it. The stepparent may also blame it on his or her partner, or on other people (Harvey Wenzel, 2001). The key is to go deeper into the problem, and to carefully analyze each of the possible solutions with his or her partner (Harvey Wenzel, 2001). In this regard, I should not get emotionally affected by what Jessica told me. Talking to the people in her immediate circle can help me find the information I need to deal with the situation. Also, I should consult her father about the solution that will best work for Jessica and our family. The quality of any relationship is dependent on the time and attention partners want to put into it (Harvey Wenzel, 2001). I understand that earning back Jessica’s respect will require my dedication. What we feel towards each other may signal a more intricate issue that we want to avoid (Harvey Wenzel, 2001). I need to make her feel safe about being honest at home. I may be able to get her to trust me if I show her that I have an open mind (Harvey Wenzel, 2001). In all these attempts to reach out to her, the presence of her dad is invaluable (Harvey Wenzel, 2001). If Jessica sees that her dad trusts me by getting involved in it, she may start to realize that she, too, can trust me. Part III Solution The paper is written from the perspective of a stepparent who is concerned about her child’s behavior. The problem discussed is not true for the author. Most stepfamilies undergoing behavioral problems need education rather therapy. In many cases, simply being aware that what they are experiencing is typical is enough to give them hope of reconciliation (Harvey Wenzel, 2001). Families need to learn about stepfamily dynamics in order to have a good grasp of what is going on. Online and offline information are given for free by many organizations focusing on stepfamily relationships (Cartwright, Fansworth, Mobley, 2009). Families may also seek therapy and join support groups. One particular agency that provides professional help to stepfamilies in different parts of the country is the National Stepfamily Resource Center, formerly known as the Stepfamily Association of America. It is a nonprofit organization that allows couples and children in stepfamilies access to research-based resources related to stepfamily issues and the professionals who work with them (NSRC, 2014). They also offer media consulting and products intended for stepfamilies. They provide a list of trained therapists who can provide families help with regard to their specific problem, as well as guidelines on how they can find professionals that meet the needs of their family (NSRC, 2014). The National Stepfamily Resource Center can make a great starting point for people who are dealing with a stepfamily problem for the first time. Meanwhile, Strong Stepfamilies assumes that the stepfamily is different from a nuclear family; hence, they design customized approach to stepfamily concerns. Based in North Carolina, Strong Stepfamilies focuses at selecting the right tools and resources for helping stepparents and their children (Strong Stepfamilies, 2014). The founder of this institution has conducted independent research about stepfamilies with emphasis on the issues of a stepmother. Its mission is to get families to recover from the trauma, and to adjust within a newly blended family. Professionals at Strong Stepfamilies begins by evaluating where the conflict stems from, and then identifies if an individual, couple, or family counseling is necessary (Strong Stepfamilies, 2014). The institution also offers group counseling, where people with common stepfamily concerns are grouped together for sharing of ideas (Strong Stepfamilies, 2014). I conclude that my relationship with Jessica is in jeopardy due to many reasons, most of which have nothing to do with respect. She could be feeling the pressure of being a stepchild, now that her dad and I have a baby together. She might also not like the idea of not seeing her dad as often as she used to. Also, I must change the way I treated her, and ask her dad to have time for her as much as he can. I am clueless about how I should deal with the solution, but I can find the information I need from the National Stepfamily Resource Center. In case, I realize that we need therapy, we will seek help from Strong Stepfamilies. References Cartwright, C., Farnsworth, V., Mobley, V. (2009). Relationship with step-parents in the life stories of young adults of divorce. Family Matters 82: 30-37. Child Welfare Information Gateway (2014). Chapter 6: Preventing child abuse and neglect. Retrieved from https://www.childwelfare.gov/pubs/usermanuals/educator/educatorf.cfm. Harvey, J.H., Wenzel, A. (2001). A clinicians guide to maintaining and enhancing close relationships. Routledge Hetherington, E. M., Kelly, J. (2002). For better or for worse: Divorce reconsidered. New York: W. W. Norton. Lintermans, G. (2010). The secrets to stepfamily success. New York: Gloria Lintermans. NSRC (2014). About the NSRC: Who we are. Retrieved from http://www.stepfamilies.info/about.php. Strong Stepfamilies (2014). About us. Retrieved from http://strongstepfamilies.com/about

International Relations During The Great Depression

INTERNATIONAL RELATIONS DURING THE GREAT DEPRESSION Janine Douglas CHST 504 Professor Kasprzak 16 July, 2015 The First World War rocked the world into a modern era of warfare and diplomacy. The twentieth century had started with a literal bang, that scarred the world with the amount of devastation they had not known they were capable of. This would be the beginning of a few decades that would be tumultuous - to say the least - for Europe. Close on the heels of the First World War came the Stock Market Crash of 1929, and the 1930s would come to be known as an era of economic depression, fractured international relationships, appeasement, and totalitarian governments that would rise up and cause devastation that would echo into the next century. International relationships during the 1930s were greatly affected by the consequences of the First World War, as well as the economic downfall of the Great Depression. Europe following the First World War was like an injured dog , retreating with its tail between its legs to lick its wounds. The devastation of the First World War caused most European countries to isolate themselves in their own failing economies, in an attempt to rehabilitate after the destruction of the war. The 1920s saw demilitarization in Britain, France, America, Germany, and most every country. The aim, here was to forget the horror that the world had just gone through, and to ensure that it did not happen again. However, despite having signed theShow MoreRelatedGlobal Effects Of The Great Depression Essay1099 Words   |  5 PagesGrace Young Dr. John R. Dabrowski American History II, AMH-2020-H01 7 December 2016 Global Effects of the Great Depression When the American stock market crashed on the infamous Black Tuesday in October 1929, the resulting circumstances were felt worldwide. This crisis resulted in a devastating economic collapse. 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The Cask Of Amontillado By Edgar Allan Poe - 763 Words

Throughout American literature, stories contain themes that can be similar or different. The themes are as diverse as the stories themselves. Three stories will be discussed in this paper -- first, Edgar Allan Poe’s The Cask of Amontillado tells a dark tale of revenge. Next, in Shirley Jackson’s The Lottery, it is shown that a tradition can be dangerous when followed blindly. Finally, Nathaniel Hawthorne’s Young Goodman Brown deals with the loss of innocence and faith. In The Cask of Amontillado, the narrator, Montresor, is seeking revenge on Fortunato, a man who has offended him one too many times. Montresor lures an already drunken Fortunato into the catacombs beneath his house with the enticing idea of trying some amontillado that he†¦show more content†¦This proves to be true in The Lottery. On a summer morning, June 27th to be exact, a small town gathers to conduct their annual lottery. Nobody knows when it began and nobody believes that it should e ver end. In this ritual, for lack of a better word, each head of the family draws a slip of paper from a black box. The head of the Hutchinson family, Bill, draws a slip of paper with a black dot. His wife Tessie claims that it’s unfair that Bill drew that certain slip of paper. The five member Hutchinson clan proceeds to the front of the townspeople to draw slips of paper once again. The town holds its breath as the Hutchinsons draw their slips of paper. They open them to find that Tessie drew the slip of paper with the black dot. Mr. Summers, the man who is over the annual lottery remarks, â€Å"Let’s finish this,† and the townspeople proceed to stone Tessie Hutchinson to death. In Young Goodman Brown, Nathaniel Hawthorne shows that human nature is full of wickedness. Upon bidding farewell to his wife, Faith, Goodman Brown departs into the forest to meet someone who bears a close resemblance to him. Along the way, Goodman Brown sees a woman who taught him catechism when he was younger. Why would such a godly woman of the community be partaking in the same errand that Goodman Brown is partaking in? After a while, Goodman Brown sits down, resolute on not going any farther into the forest. He hears what sounds like the minister and a deacon discussing a woman

Teacher Excessive Absenteeism Decision

Question: Discuss about the Teacher Excessive Absenteeism Decision. Answer: Introduction Teachers are the tremendously important aspects of any society. They form an extreme societal facet for different reasons. For instance, they educate the youths who in turn grow to become great leaders in the society. Indisputably, teachers impart knowledge in their prime years and anything that children learn stay with them throughout their lives. Apart from parents, teachers define the future of children thus make the future safe, secure, and great (MoE, 2017). It appears that nearly every must have attended school at any point of their lives and they can attest to how the right educator values his or her job. In fact, when a teacher discovers that children get interested in the subject, they thus develop a learning thirst in them to allow them acquire and learn knowledge. Teacher absenteeism is a problem that must be addressed with a great seriousness it deserves. According to Miller (2008), teacher nonattendance adversely affects the performance and achievements of students thus influence the school culture negatively. The Maldives Civil Service Regulations provide an opportunity for temporary employment. These temporary employees, especially who replace the k-8-12 teachers must adhere to the codes of conduct as provided by the MoD (CSC, 2014). These unqualified replacements have influenced the classroom and learning environment negatively. The excessive absenteeism of teachers is an impediment to an enhanced education system (UNESCO, 2014). Without a doubt, when educators engage in an excessive absenteeism, it becomes the responsibility of the supervisor or principal to determine the impact on learners. Lewis (2006) argues that when the students achievement is compromised, challenging the attendance records of a teacher to facilitate termination mig ht not be a pleasant decision, but necessary (Bradley, Green, Leeves, 2007). Since arriving at the best decision was difficult, it was prudent to use the following decision-making model. Succinct Statement One of the teaching staff had taken an excessive sick leave. The principal of the institution felt concerned about the impact on the absenteeism of the educator on his students. Besides, his concern revolved on the impact on the other teaching members whom he feared would copy this habit if he continued to sit back. He had to act on this absenteeism case. In this situation, two things were at stake: other staff members and students. Without a doubt, when such situations arise that can cause termination of staffs contract, he had to consider in defining the objectives: As the Principal of the institution, he was concerned about the excessive absences of our teacher since 2010. Since the teaching member was new because he was just transferred to this school recently, he was compelled to review his previous attendance records. To his dismay, the teacher had the worst record, as absenteeism was a major issue in the former station. With this information at hand, he found the best ground to address the issue. Unfortunately, he felt disappointed because the previous Principal never informed me about the issue as the government was initiating his transfer. As a school manager and administrator, he made the first effort to seek an appointment with the casualty. He used the opportunity to express his disappointment and concern regarding the impact of teachers absence on our school and his students. He used the chance to talk to him about the significance of all teachers to work as a team to enhance student performance. In fact, he made his position clear to him that weak links in the education were never condoned in the institution. He further discussed with him at length about the consequences of frequent absences and reliant on substitute staff on the performance of students (Vargas, 2012). Despite his claim of legitimate illness, his doctor only provided information on one issue thus justifying his absences for some days. The doctors notes showed that the teacher needed some bed rest for some few days. To this effect, we discussed other sick days and made progress. This served as the first instance of notifying the teacher that the absences were detrimental to student learning process. He later planned for several meetings with the teacher. At every meeting, he made summary notes about his attendance records and captured the excused and unexcused absences. He further attached detailed information relating to our discussion such as his earnings. Indeed, he has, on several occasions warned him of termination actions if the situation persisted. After the meetings, he made the commitment to change by signing the summaries. He knew the situation would improve, but only to learn that moved from worse to worst. Invitation of the Ministry of Education Official When the situation worsened, he took the responsibility to invite the district supervisor to join us in this discussion. The district Personnel honoured the invitation and helped us in discussing the problem. After a long deliberation, the teacher made a commitment to honour the counsel. With this agreement in place, we signed the notes to formalize the meeting. According to the correspondent from the meeting, the educator promised to change by improving his attendance rates. However, he opted to miss the next five days without an excuse. As a result, he was concerned and sought for administrative hearings. This procedure met the disciplinary provisions applicable in the institution thus allowing for the navigation of the issue. Administrative hearing This process was important in the disciplinary procedures of a teacher. In the hearing, the attendees included the district education supervisor, the student services supervisor, the teacher, the educators father, and school principal. Since the administrative hearing team was never a union district, the attendees never allowed the union representative in this meeting. To beginning the meeting, the principle presented all the previous records and documentations relating to the case. The District Personnel also provided the list of absences the teacher had taken during the last four years. At this stage, the teacher provided no reasons to support his rampant cases of absenteeism. This made it difficult for the administrative hearing proceeding to arrive at the best decision. The teacher never provided the supportive documents to show cause why he should be punished. The District Supervisor, who attended the meeting, took time and reviewed the facts based on the records provided. Considering that the employee never proved his case, the hearing agreed that termination of the teacher was the best decision. The hearing team unanimously allowed the teacher to appeal this decision because the rule of natural justice was inevitable (Groves, n.d). Analysis and Decision The attendance of the teacher was pathetic as the records of the district supervisor confirmed high absenteeism rate. The teacher never challenged the records of the education officer. Nevertheless, the educator held that he had a genuine reason to justify the absence (Chaudhury et al., 2012). During the 2016/2017 school calendar, the educator was serving as a caregiver to his father after an accident and then later underwent quadruple bypass surgery. In the previously academic year (2015/2016), the teacher underwent the worst surgery, while in 2014; he got involved in a car accident. Since 2014, the teacher has been involved in a worst abusive domestic relationship thus compelling him to miss work regularly. The teacher had also suffered from post-partum depression thus affecting him. The MoE has no issues with the reasons provided in supporting his absence; the officer only found that the teacher only had one approved leave as defined in Glynn (2012). Unfortunately, the educator having realized that his absence was causing jitters, he requested filled a form of Leave of Absence immediately the Principal had initiated the disciplinary actions including the tenure charges. The issue here is beyond personal injuries and even events that compelled the teacher to miss work. It is for the education officer to determine whether the teacher should continue as an employee yet he misses significant workload thus affecting the school. From the 2010-11 school colanders through the 2012-13 school years, the teacher missed a complete 60 school days annually. In 2013-14 and 2014-15, he was out of school for approximately 200 days combined. Based on the testimony of the school principal, the excessive absenteeism pattern disrupted the instruction continuity for the students and affecting the collaboration between the teaching staff (Whitney, McGuire, McCullough, 2004). It even had a long-term effect on the educational planning thus making it difficult to determine the progress of learners. However, the teacher put on a strong face and defence by claiming that he was working with two substitute teachers in handling the class as explained by Vargas (2012). One teacher was Special Education, teacher and an elementary education teacher filled his position. The teacher testified that he was always available for consultations for both parents and substitute teachers (Chaudhury et al., 2012). Conversely, he downplayed his significance of being present in the classroom. Undeniably, the school could have had qualified substitute teachers; his excessive absence showed a change of personnel before the students. These changes in the classroom have a potential impact as it impeded planning and affected collaboration between the staff as noted by the principal. It clearly affected the instruction continuity (Cheah, 2015). The MoE slammed the teacher with three charges including neglect of duty, misconduct, and alleging incapacity. The unbecoming conduct and neglect of duty confirmed that the teacher disregarded his duties. Unfortunately, the provided evidence never revealed any aspects of disregard or fault because nothing justified that the educator avoided his duties intentionally. In fact, his excessive absenteeism is caused by various unfortunate events such as personal injuries and illness, fathers illness, and domestic problems. For this reason, the appeal chamber headed by the MoE exonerated the teacher from neglect of duty and unbecoming conduct because the principal could not prove. However, the principal demonstrated the aspects of incapacity. For instance, there was sufficient evidence showing that the high absenteeism rate made it difficult to rely on him. As a result, the teacher could not meet the responsibilities attached to his position. Although the appeal team argued that the reasons for the absences could have been genuine, the rate was intolerable because it affected the students in the classroom and even the effectiveness of learning. For example, the teacher was absent for about 20 school days annually that is beyond the paid personal and sick leave time (Farrell Venator, 2012). In the subsequent two years, the teacher was absent for 200 days that is almost a full school year. Without a doubt, the consistent and repeated pattern of absenteeism diminished his value in the school including teachers, students, and the parents. To this effect, the incapacity changes were appropriate as demonstrated by Finlayson (2009). For the reasons given, the only outstanding one is incapacity. This is a sufficient ground to warrant dismissal from the profession because it brought embarrassment to teachers and put the noble profession into dispute. Why this Decision Mattered The decision was in line with the Maldivian Civil Service Act that expects teachers who abscond duties for about 15 consecutive days would automatically cease to be employees. The Maldives Civil Service Regulations provides that when an employee avoids duties for fifteen conservative days, the individual shall have violated the regulation leading to dismissal. In any natural justice system, it is fair to follow the laid down procedures to punish the teacher and get his side of the story as explained by Oliver and Reschly (2014). This process followed a real judicial mechanism that allows an accused person to defend his position. The administrative proceedings as provided in the Maldives education rules ensures the claimant adduce evidence to enhance punishment. The law compels any state-appointed officer to head the hearings so that he can perform as a judge. The law further identifies charges that the principal can prefer against a teacher. As spelt out in the Maldivian Civil Service Act, the penalty was deserved because the educator had absconded duties for more days and the least penalty would be expulsion from the profession because it affected students learning (UNICEF, 2000). The use of this rule allows the involved officer to use the best penalty based on the previous proceedings and records. The just cause standard principle is also an important factor in determining penalties (Cheah, 2015). In any decision-making, it is critical to assess the guilt of a teacher and determine the penalty. Miller (2012) found that this problem could be achieved by considering various principles such as progressive discipline, teachers innocence assumption, the years of employments, and the bar of dismissal. In any disciplinary proceedings, the accused is assumed innocent, and the panel has the burden to prove otherwise. The Maldivian Civil Service Act allows for the imposition of non-persuasion risks on the MoE (UNICEF, 2000). The preponderance of evidence would justify the proof. To this effect, the penalty would not stand if the MoE presents insufficient evidentiary standards. However, if the evidence provides are equally balanced, it would be prudent for the officer to favour the teacher, not the complainant. Importantly, the Hearing Officer should stick to the Maldivian Civil Service Act, especially when handling the issues regarding performance (UNICEF, 2000). Based on the provided evidence and insufficient argument of the teacher, the termination decision was justifiable. Provisions for Teacher Absence The government has established statutes that state the requirements for the attendance of teachers. These written policies also detail the procedures that Ministry of Education provisions can use to record teachers attendances. Based on the Maldivian Civil Service Act, the educators are held accountable for the attendance standards as provided for in regulations. Teachers are civil servants in Maldives and are treated like any other employees in case of any misconduct. However, an employee can exceed the attendance policies based on the circumstances at hand. For instance, a teacher can maintain that his absence never had an impact on students. Rogers and Vegas (2009) found that as part of the employee relations principle, excessive absenteeism can lead to termination of service. In cases where absenteeism is excessive, the law allows the Hearing Officer to impose a penalty, in particular where it affects the learning process and to teach productivity and performance as affirmed by S ezgin, Kosar, Kilinc, and Ogdem (2014). The officer can also base his decision on the testimony of the teacher during the administrative hearings. In fact, the teacher never provided any testimony. He, however, provided the doctors notes that never captured all the absent days (Lewis, 2006). Therefore, he failed to rationalize his absence, as most of the responses were evasive. The assessment of the situation indicates that the teacher could not improve his attendances. Although the dismissal decision looks punitive, it is the best. There is need for all employees to work according to the Maldivian Civil Service Code of conduct. Nonetheless, the MoE can take appropriate action including advising, fining, reduction in classification, re-assigning of duties, or reprimanding (MCS, n.d). In the situation at hand, the Ministry of Education provided satisfactory evidence that the teacher had engaged in excessive absenteeism behaviour. As a result, the rating of the educator has been disappointing. Since the institution has established regulations and policies on absenteeism and adopted the Maldives Civil Service Regulations, the teacher must always act or behave in a way that restores the dignity of service leading to a satisfactory rating (Roza, 2007). This made the MoE, through the commission and Principal justifies the impact on the continuity and performance students (Miller, Murnane, Willett, 2008). The officer noted that the teacher failed to take responsibility to honour and observe his working hours. As such, he failed to acknowledge the harm his action caused students. It was also proved that the teacher had undergone through disciplinary processes and never changed. The decision regarding this penalty is based on the inaction of the previous warnings imposed on the teacher. The factor that determined the penalty was harming that excessive absenteeism did to the school, teachers, parents, and students. Indeed, the respondent was expected to play a crucial role in teaching the children (Gottfried, 2010). To this effect, his absence disregarded this impact as students deserve to be taught and parents expected the teacher to perform his duties properly. Since the accused lied on his medical records and conditions, the preferred charge was justified. For example, when an individual has been put on notice and informed that any further absenteeism would be intolerable, and then he proceeds to skip school days again (Shiuna, Sodiq, 2013). The problem could be beyond the scope thus the possibility of recommending rehabilitation and extended suspension could have helped the respondent. Removing bad and terrible educators can help in fixing the problems of excessive absenteeism in public schools. Pandey and Upadhyay (2016) maintained that the principal has to support teachers, but also facilitate the removal of ineffective teachers from class. The firing or dismissing of such teachers is never meant to punish the society. It aims at protecting the teachers and students from damages thus improve the quality of the teaching career (Snowden Boone, 2007). To remove inadequate teachers, the school should have policy mechanisms that enhance quality education and capacity building. Unlike other teaching resources, a teacher is the only resource that can enable a student to learn. Indeed, a student learning is achievable through a competent classroom teacher. These teachers have legal duty to protect children and offer the best teaching services in the classroom. Under the Article 22 of the Employment Act, the dismissal of a civil servant like a teacher must follow due pro cess. Conclusion In Maldives, teachers who perform dismally have no room to remain in the learning institutions. For example, even teachers handling grade 8, 9 or 11 and 12 classes would be thrown out if they abscond duties for fifteen consecutive days without informing to the head supervisor or leading teacher as provided in the Maldives Civil Service Regulations and Article 22 of the Employment Act. Even if the teacher gets absent for one day he or she has to take extra classes for the missed sessions. The question that people ponder is why permitting them to work or be in the schools. This underlying institutionalized problem seems to emphasize the teachers personal welfare instead of students. In fact, the teacher would not be bothered of any convictions for their unbecoming conducts. It is thus the time for the society to improve teachers status and compare them with other competent professionals. This can involve recruiting and selecting people who have relevant skills to teach. The principal a nd MoE should make tough decisions to avoid unbecoming practices among teachers. For instance, teachers need to understand that excessive absenteeism can cost them their job. This conduct puts the lives of many stakeholders in danger. Therefore, with proper disciplinary proceedings as undertaken in this paper, sanity will return to the public schools. In the end, he believed he made the right decision to safeguard and protect the students because they stood to be compromised if the teacher was unpunished. Although the appeal disregarded some accusations against the teacher such as unbecoming conduct and neglect of duty, they found him culpable of excessive absenteeism thus defining the ground for dismissal. References Bradley, S., Green, C., Leeves, G. (2007). Worker Absence and Shirking: Evidence from Matched Teacher-School Data. Labour Economics, 14(3), 319-334. Chaudhury, N. et al. (2012). Missing in Action: Teacher and Health Worker Absence in Developing Countries, Journal of Economic Perspectives, 20(1), 91-116. Cheah, K.S.L. (2015). Teachers Classroom Control and Decision-Making: A Case Study of a Private School in Subang, Selangor. Australian Journal of Business and Economic Studies, 1(1), 1-17. Retrieved from https://studentsrepo.um.edu.my/5992/6/Journal_1_(Only_1st_page).pdf Civil Service Commission (CSC). (2014). Maldives Civil Service Regulation. Regulation no. 2014/R-311. Retrieved from https://www.csc.gov.mv/v3/wp-content/uploads/2015/12/MALDIVES-CIVIL-SERVICE-REGULATION-final-review.pdf. Farrell, J. Venator, J. (2012). Fact Sheet: Paid sick Days. Washington: Centre for American Progress. Retrieved from https://www.americanprogress.org/issues/labor/news/2012/08/16/12031/fact-sheet-paid-sick-days/ Finlayson, M. (2009). The Impact of Teacher Absenteeism on Student Performance: The Case of the Cobb County School District. Dissertation. Retrieved from https://digitalcommons.kennesaw.edu/cgi/viewcontent.cgi?article=1006context=etd Glynn, S.J. (2012). Fact Sheet: Paid Family and Medical Leave. Washington: Centre for American Progress. Retrieved from https://www.americanprogress.org/issues/labor/news/2012/08/16/11980/fact-sheet-paid-family-and-medical-leave/ Gottfried, M.A. (2010). Evaluating the Relationship between Student Attendance and Achievement in Urban Elementary and Middle Schools: An Instrumental Variables Approach. American Educational Research Journal, 47(2), 434-465. Groves, M. (n.d). Exclusion of the Rules of Natural Justice. Monash University Law Review, 39(2), 286-313. Retrieved from https://www.austlii.edu.au/au/journals/MonashULawRw/2013/11.pdf Lewis, R. (2006). Classroom discipline in Australia. Handbook of Classroom Management: Research, Practice and Contemporary Issues, 1193-1214. MCS. (n.d). The Maldivian Civil Service Act. (Unofficial Translation). Retrieved from https://en.csc.gov.mv/media/CS.Act_.English.Translation.pdf Miller, R. (2008).Tales of Teacher Absence. Washington: Centre for American Progress. Miller, R. (2012, Nov). Teacher Absence as a Leading Indicator of Student Achievement. Washington, DC: Centre for American Progress. Retrieved from https://www.americanprogress.org/wp-content/uploads/2012/11/TeacherAbsence-6.pdf Miller, R.T., Murnane, R.J., Willett, J.B. (2008). Do Teacher Absences Impact Student Achievement? Longitudinal Evidence from One Urban School District. Educational Evaluation and Policy Analysis, 30(2), 181-200. Ministry of Education (MoE). (2017). Teachers. Republic of Maldives. Retrieved from https://www.moe.gov.mv/en/page/Teachers Oliver, R. M., Reschly, D. J. (2014). Special Education Teacher Preparation in Classroom Organization and Behaviour Management. Handbook of Research on Special Education Teacher Preparation, 288. Pandey, K., Upadhyay, P. (2016). Promoting Global Peace and Civic Engagement through Education. Hershey, PA: Information Science Reference. Rogers, F.H., Vegas, E. (2009). No More Cutting Class? Reducing Teacher Absence and Providing Incentives for Performance. Policy Research Working Paper 4847. Retrieved from https://core.ac.uk/download/pdf/6373142.pdf Roza, M. (2007). Frozen Assets: Rethinking Teacher Contracts Could Free Billions for School Reform. Washington: Education Sector. Sezgin, F., Kosar, S., Kilinc, A.C., Ogdem, Z. (2014). Teacher Absenteeism in Turkish Primary Schools: A Qualitative Perspective from School Principals. International Online Journal of Educational Sciences, 6(3), 612-625. Retrieved from https://www.iojes.net/userfiles/article/iojes_1473.pdf Shiuna, M., Sodiq, A. (2013). Improving Education in the Maldives: Stakeholder Perspectives on the Maldives Education. International Journal of Small Economies, 4(1), 23-38. Retrieved from https://ijse.maldivesresearch.org/wp-content/uploads/2014/01/IJSE-ISSUE-4-Shiuna-Sodiq-2013-Education-Forum-Maldives.pdf Snowden, D. J., Boone, M. E. (2007). A Leader's Framework for Decision Making. Harvard Business Review, 85(11), 68. UNESCO. (2014). Teaching and Learning: Achieving Quality For All: Summary. Paris: UNESCO. UNICEF. (2000). Defining Quality in Education. New York, NY: UNICEF. Retrieved from https://www.unicef.org/education/files/QualityEducation.PDF. Vargas, C. (2012, Aug 16). Camden School District Hires Private Substitute-Teacher Agency. The Philadelphia Inquirer. https://articles.philly.com/2012-08-16/news/33233648_1_substitute-teachers-teacher-certification-haddon-township-school-district Whitney, S. N., McGuire, A. L., McCullough, L. B. (2004). A Typology of Shared Decision Making, Informed Consent, and Simple Consent. Annals of Internal Medicine, 140(1), 54-59.

Parenting a Balancing Act Essay Example

Parenting: a Balancing Act Essay Parenting: A Balancing Act â€Å"You’re not doing well enough! † Just how many times have children heard this from their parents? After all, parents do expect their children to do well in life, but sometimes those expectations could place too much of a burden on their children. Most parents worry about the â€Å"Big C†, college, which is shown through many of their expectations on their child’s academics, extra-curriculum’s, and sometimes future careers. A study in 2007 by the Childs Trend Databank shows that 69. 7% parents expected their children from 6th to 12th grade to receive a Bachelor’s degree or higher. Easier said than done right? Of course, the parent might fill their child’s schedule with dozens of E. C’s and A. P classes to make them stand out in the college applications, but that does not mean they will automatically get into any university or college. Like in the article, â€Å"Taming the Overachieving Monster†, the composer, Callie Schweitzer, writes: â€Å"Does being class president, captain of the track team, and sole organizer of the schools clothing drive add up to a top college acceptance? No. All it guarantees is stress. † Parenting requires balance between high and low expectations, a task not to be taken lightly. We will write a custom essay sample on Parenting: a Balancing Act specifically for you for only $16.38 $13.9/page Order now We will write a custom essay sample on Parenting: a Balancing Act specifically for you FOR ONLY $16.38 $13.9/page Hire Writer We will write a custom essay sample on Parenting: a Balancing Act specifically for you FOR ONLY $16.38 $13.9/page Hire Writer Thus, parents need to learn how to limit their own expectations of their children due to the stress it causes on them. In some cases, the parents put their children in many after-school programs and encourage them to do more if they want to. Of course, not all children look forward to doing so much and simply want to hang around with their friends or go out shopping. However, this sometimes leads to conflict between parent and child. â€Å"I only want to relax in my room and talk on Facebook and have fun, but my mom yells at me to go do more practice work for the SAT’s. says Anonymous 1, a student. The SAT’s, or the super important test for college, is one of the few tests that is required by colleges in order to apply to them. Out of a maximum 2400 points, parents expect their children to score high in order for them to get into a good college, but to get a high score in the SATs is not exactly the easiest task to do. Some parents expect 2400, some expect 2000 and up, but it still adds more stress to their child when their already grueling schedule is weighted down even more with SAT preparatory classes. Back in the article, â€Å"Taming the Overachieving Monster†, Callie Schweitzer states, â€Å"Its natural to want your child to succeed, but what, exactly, qualifies as achievement? Too many of todays parents define it as a 2400 on the SATs*, a schedule full of AP classes, and extracurricular activities that take up every afternoon of the school week. Parents often dismiss the reality of the hours of homework this kind of academic load entails†. And it is quite true; some parents do often dismiss the amount of workload coming from all these academic loads. In a clear sense, parents need to get rid of college rankings or reputations because any college can give their children a good education despite the rank, if their children actually work hard and try. Just because a college or university is ranked high does not mean that going to any college that is not ranked high nor has a great reputation like the â€Å"Ivy Leagues† will not give a good education. After all, even if you have a degree from a â€Å"prestigious† college, there is no guarantee that employers will fight for you or you getting instant jobs the moment you step out. Like in the article, â€Å"Taming the Overachieving Monster,† Callie Schweitzer, quotes, Alexandra Robbins, best-selling author of The Overachievers: The Secret Lives of Driven Kids. Robbins writes,†Ã¢â‚¬â„¢Forget the name-brands, forget the reputations in your area and social circles, and for goodness sake, throw the college rankings in the trash. ’ Getting a job takes your own effort and time, not solely on getting a degree from a super-ranked college. â€Å"My parents expect me to get into the UC’s only and not any State schools or City Colleges,† replies Anonymous 5, yet another student worried about their future paths. To be honest, it really is up to the student to choose which college he or she wants to go to and not the parent deciding which college for them. True, any parents can expect their child to do well in school and life, but even that can lead to too much of a burden upon their child. It must be taken into account that not all students enjoy studying for school or even actually going to school. After all, everyone is different, but that is not really taken into account when it comes to schooling or work. As in many cases, there are good and bad sides to expectations from parents. In some cases, it can be harmful or stressful for the student and sometimes helpful. â€Å"My mom expects a lot out of me and I do find it wearing at times, but I do believe that it helps me work harder in school,† informs Anonymous 2, another student. Sometimes, children with high expectations from parents feel the urge to do well in sports or school to meet their parent’s expectations. Of course, to set yourself high and fail lets you learn from your mistakes and reevaluate your pathway from that. High expectations also means that kids may not be as lazy or lax about doing well in life because setting a goal in life, whether it be made by the parent or child, does help lead the way in the future. Some students have greater confidence for themselves because they know that they can achieve high expectations from their parents as well as goals. In the article, â€Å"Debate: Parental Expectations†, the writer, Lu Shizhen, writes, â€Å"Parental expectations can motivate children to build a strong mind and encourage them to achieve their best academic performance. Therefore, there is nothing wrong with parents who pin expectations on the development of their children. However, such parental expectations should be realistic. Unfortunately, planning to aim high is a good idea, but making realistic goals to achieve is not the easiest thing to do. Also, in some cases, parents might not recognize the successes of their children managing to achieve the expectations that the parents have set, which winds up leaving the child not enjoying to succeed or have major goals. I do what my mom expects me to do all the time, but most of the time, my mom gives me even harder things to accomplish, says Anonymous 3. Not all kids feel like doing every last thing parents throw at them and parents need to learn how to respect that. After all, some parents do not see how their expectations stress their children out more than it actually helps them. Eventually the stress can be too much and might crack in your child dropping of many kinds. Parents should not expect their child to live up to every expectation, because everyone has different wants, likes, personalities, hates, etc. Just like in the article, Why Cant Johnny Jump Tall Buildings? , the composer Alan Kazdin tells us, Just remember, as you go about it, that its only human for parents to tend to expect that our children can do more than they can really do. Even slight adjustments of your expectations to compensate for that tendency—a little more emphasis on shaping, a little more patience, a little reflection on whats really important to you as a parent and what behaviors can be left to disappear or develop on their own—can pro duce surprisingly excellent results. Parents expect a lot out of their children because they truly want the best from them, but often times it can go too far. Many parents do not want their children to follow their path, especially if their path was filled with difficulty and problems that they do not want their children to face, so they want to see them do better and have a life without any of the hardship their parents have faced. However, some parents force their children to do extra work in order for them not to face the problems they had and not everyone likes doing extra work. Well, its true that I want my kids to achieve far in life, but I also know that I probably sometimes do a bit too much, says Anonymous 5, a mother of 3. After all, parents expectations come from their care, but even that could be too much for their child. Of course, parents would not mind their kids to get into name brand, great reputation colleges, but that would be up to the child. I do believe that my parents want me to achieve well in life and all, but they sometimes annoy me to no end. says Anonymous 6, a student, I really hate it when Im doing something I, myself, want to do, but then my parents yell at me to do something they want me to do. Their Intentions are good, but they need to know about my own feelings when it comes to their expectations. Teenagers have a lot to say about a wide range of topics, but when it comes to their parents it can be endless. After all, the looming threat of college in the typical teenagers life causes anxiety for both the teen and parent. Unfortunately, that anxiety could lead to a split in the parent and child relationship. Sometimes their expectations are too much for me to do. I do one good thing, but they view more of the bad things I do, says Anonymous 4, another student, Its hard to achieve what they want. I understand them, but I wish they understood me more as well. Their expectations affect my life both in a good way and bad way since it makes me work harder, but leads to me getting a lot of stress and frustrations. After all, do parents truly understand their childrens feelings? Perhaps not. Due to the anxiety to see their children get into college and doing well in their life, some parents do not take the teenagers feelings into consideration. They do expect me to do well in school, and to achieve my goals, but not to do anything I want, says Anonymous 5, Sure, they want me to do what I really want to pursue and become in life, but at times they can be confusing to me. Of course, not all parents expect so much out of their children, but not to the point where expectations are completely lacking. My mom, she doesnt expect me to be perfect, with great grades, 4. 0s, or anything, so we get along fine. I do not find that affects my life that much, although my siblings influence my good grades in school, because I do not want to follow what they did in their lives. Expectations have its ups and downs, but everyone views it differently. My mom expects me to get 4. 0s and to get as many E. As as possible, which I do not find likable. Many times, we argue over the stress of my achieving well and the threat of college, but it usually never ends well. I believe that my life is more stressed and frustrated than before and I am getting tired of it, says Anonymous 6. In the end, parents definitely need to at least try to see if their children are becoming stressed out trying to pass their expectations. However, are expectations from parents really needed? Truthfully, expectations can help improve the mind set of students and their own expectations of doing well for themselves. A lack of expectations might lead to a drop in schoolwork and an allowance of bad grades. Students with uncaring parents might wind up with themselves having low expectations on grades what they expect in life from their parents. Some students believe that their parents expectations really are not needed in their already stressed lives. Well, I could just put my parent’s voices onto a tape recorder and that would be good enough. I hate how they want me to do all this stuff when I just want to do things I really want to do. I find the expectations unneeded in my life because they just add more stress in my life and annoy me to no end, states Anonymous 1. This came from a friend who particularly has a bad relationship with his parents. Some students think that their parents expectations help them, but dislike them at the same time. I think that my parents expectations help me believe that I can do well and it makes me work harder, but sometimes it becomes too much. Because if I do well, my parents expect me to even better and even if I do well in one spot, they look at a bad spot, which is frustrating, tells Anonymous 4. I do think that my parent’s expectations help me make goals in my life, but I hate it. At first, I do think they suck, but I do realize that expectations from my parents are not that bad, it is just that they sometimes expect too much out of me and ticks me off. says Anonymous 6. From this, parents expectations do have an impact on their childrens lives both negatively and positively. In the end, some students wish to deal with their parents expectations, but do not know how to do so. In Elizabeth Ryans, Straight Talk About Parents, she recommends talking to your parents on the rules or chores you have to do and why they bother you. After all, talking aloud with your parents about your problems with their expectations is definitely a start to compromising. She says that if you want to handle these problems, then start by asking yourself: What are the rules in my family? What are the rules do I think are clear to everyone? Which rules do I think are not clear to everyone? What can I do to get the unclear rules to be clearer? Which rules do I think are fair? Which rules do I think are unfair or unnecessary? Which rule am I the most upset about? Think about your parent’s feelings and not just your own, they might only just want the best out of you. Try to make your parents listen to your reasons on why they are bad with their expectations. Instead of always disagreeing and arguing, try to find things to agree on instead of nagging each other. Take note of your own feelings as well as your parents because they might just be taking note of your well-being or future. In case you may not feel like talking to your parents, why not talk to a good friend? Friends should always be there for each other, especially in times of hardship. Talk to your friend about your problems and what they think you should do. If not, just let it out. Yes, crying is human nature and a way of releasing emotion instead of bottling it up. If you’re mad you can just punch the stuffing out of your pillow, you just might find that you feel better after beating your anger out. Hopefully, parents might one day learn how to balance their expectations to not be too much or too little. It might take a while because, after all, parenting is quite the balancing act. Anonymous 1. Personal interview. 25 Jan. 2012. Anonymous 2. Personal interview. 25 Jan. 2012. Anonymous 3. Personal interview. 25 Jan. 2012. Anonymous 4. Personal interview. 25 Jan. 2012. Anonymous 5. Personal interview. 25 Jan. 2012. Anonymous 6. Personal interview. 26 Jan. 2012. Anonymous 7. Personal interview. 26 Jan. 2012. Kazdin, Alan. Why Cant Johnny Jump Tall Buildings? Slate. The Slate Group,   Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  2012. Web. 29 Jan. 2012. http://www. slate. com/articles/life/family/2008/   Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  11/why_cant_johnny_jump_tall_buildings. single. html. Percentage of Children in Grades 6-12 Whose Parents Expect Them To Receive a Bachelors Degree or Higher, 2003 and 2007. Chart. N. p. : Child Trends DataBank, 2007. Childs Trends DataBank. Web. 1 Feb. 2012. http://www. hildtrendsdatabank. org/? q=node/366. Ryan, Elizabeth A. Straight Talk About Parents. New York: New York Facts On File, 1989. Print. Schweitzer, Callie. Taming the Overachieving Monster. Parenting Teens Online. iFOS Publishing and Parenting Teens Network. , Jan. 2008. Web. 27 Jan. 2012. http://www. parentingteensonline. com/article/show/title/ Taming_the_Overachieving_Monster. Shizhen, Lu. Debate: Parental Expectations. China Daily. China Daily,   Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  1995-2012. Web. 29 Jan. 2012. http://www. chinadaily. com. cn/opinion/   Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  2011-05/30/content_12601014_2. htm. Parenting a Balancing Act Essay Example Parenting: a Balancing Act Essay Parenting: A Balancing Act â€Å"You’re not doing well enough! † Just how many times have children heard this from their parents? After all, parents do expect their children to do well in life, but sometimes those expectations could place too much of a burden on their children. Most parents worry about the â€Å"Big C†, college, which is shown through many of their expectations on their child’s academics, extra-curriculum’s, and sometimes future careers. A study in 2007 by the Childs Trend Databank shows that 69. 7% parents expected their children from 6th to 12th grade to receive a Bachelor’s degree or higher. Easier said than done right? Of course, the parent might fill their child’s schedule with dozens of E. C’s and A. P classes to make them stand out in the college applications, but that does not mean they will automatically get into any university or college. Like in the article, â€Å"Taming the Overachieving Monster†, the composer, Callie Schweitzer, writes: â€Å"Does being class president, captain of the track team, and sole organizer of the schools clothing drive add up to a top college acceptance? No. All it guarantees is stress. † Parenting requires balance between high and low expectations, a task not to be taken lightly. We will write a custom essay sample on Parenting: a Balancing Act specifically for you for only $16.38 $13.9/page Order now We will write a custom essay sample on Parenting: a Balancing Act specifically for you FOR ONLY $16.38 $13.9/page Hire Writer We will write a custom essay sample on Parenting: a Balancing Act specifically for you FOR ONLY $16.38 $13.9/page Hire Writer Thus, parents need to learn how to limit their own expectations of their children due to the stress it causes on them. In some cases, the parents put their children in many after-school programs and encourage them to do more if they want to. Of course, not all children look forward to doing so much and simply want to hang around with their friends or go out shopping. However, this sometimes leads to conflict between parent and child. â€Å"I only want to relax in my room and talk on Facebook and have fun, but my mom yells at me to go do more practice work for the SAT’s. says Anonymous 1, a student. The SAT’s, or the super important test for college, is one of the few tests that is required by colleges in order to apply to them. Out of a maximum 2400 points, parents expect their children to score high in order for them to get into a good college, but to get a high score in the SATs is not exactly the easiest task to do. Some parents expect 2400, some expect 2000 and up, but it still adds more stress to their child when their already grueling schedule is weighted down even more with SAT preparatory classes. Back in the article, â€Å"Taming the Overachieving Monster†, Callie Schweitzer states, â€Å"Its natural to want your child to succeed, but what, exactly, qualifies as achievement? Too many of todays parents define it as a 2400 on the SATs*, a schedule full of AP classes, and extracurricular activities that take up every afternoon of the school week. Parents often dismiss the reality of the hours of homework this kind of academic load entails†. And it is quite true; some parents do often dismiss the amount of workload coming from all these academic loads. In a clear sense, parents need to get rid of college rankings or reputations because any college can give their children a good education despite the rank, if their children actually work hard and try. Just because a college or university is ranked high does not mean that going to any college that is not ranked high nor has a great reputation like the â€Å"Ivy Leagues† will not give a good education. After all, even if you have a degree from a â€Å"prestigious† college, there is no guarantee that employers will fight for you or you getting instant jobs the moment you step out. Like in the article, â€Å"Taming the Overachieving Monster,† Callie Schweitzer, quotes, Alexandra Robbins, best-selling author of The Overachievers: The Secret Lives of Driven Kids. Robbins writes,†Ã¢â‚¬â„¢Forget the name-brands, forget the reputations in your area and social circles, and for goodness sake, throw the college rankings in the trash. ’ Getting a job takes your own effort and time, not solely on getting a degree from a super-ranked college. â€Å"My parents expect me to get into the UC’s only and not any State schools or City Colleges,† replies Anonymous 5, yet another student worried about their future paths. To be honest, it really is up to the student to choose which college he or she wants to go to and not the parent deciding which college for them. True, any parents can expect their child to do well in school and life, but even that can lead to too much of a burden upon their child. It must be taken into account that not all students enjoy studying for school or even actually going to school. After all, everyone is different, but that is not really taken into account when it comes to schooling or work. As in many cases, there are good and bad sides to expectations from parents. In some cases, it can be harmful or stressful for the student and sometimes helpful. â€Å"My mom expects a lot out of me and I do find it wearing at times, but I do believe that it helps me work harder in school,† informs Anonymous 2, another student. Sometimes, children with high expectations from parents feel the urge to do well in sports or school to meet their parent’s expectations. Of course, to set yourself high and fail lets you learn from your mistakes and reevaluate your pathway from that. High expectations also means that kids may not be as lazy or lax about doing well in life because setting a goal in life, whether it be made by the parent or child, does help lead the way in the future. Some students have greater confidence for themselves because they know that they can achieve high expectations from their parents as well as goals. In the article, â€Å"Debate: Parental Expectations†, the writer, Lu Shizhen, writes, â€Å"Parental expectations can motivate children to build a strong mind and encourage them to achieve their best academic performance. Therefore, there is nothing wrong with parents who pin expectations on the development of their children. However, such parental expectations should be realistic. Unfortunately, planning to aim high is a good idea, but making realistic goals to achieve is not the easiest thing to do. Also, in some cases, parents might not recognize the successes of their children managing to achieve the expectations that the parents have set, which winds up leaving the child not enjoying to succeed or have major goals. I do what my mom expects me to do all the time, but most of the time, my mom gives me even harder things to accomplish, says Anonymous 3. Not all kids feel like doing every last thing parents throw at them and parents need to learn how to respect that. After all, some parents do not see how their expectations stress their children out more than it actually helps them. Eventually the stress can be too much and might crack in your child dropping of many kinds. Parents should not expect their child to live up to every expectation, because everyone has different wants, likes, personalities, hates, etc. Just like in the article, Why Cant Johnny Jump Tall Buildings? , the composer Alan Kazdin tells us, Just remember, as you go about it, that its only human for parents to tend to expect that our children can do more than they can really do. Even slight adjustments of your expectations to compensate for that tendency—a little more emphasis on shaping, a little more patience, a little reflection on whats really important to you as a parent and what behaviors can be left to disappear or develop on their own—can pro duce surprisingly excellent results. Parents expect a lot out of their children because they truly want the best from them, but often times it can go too far. Many parents do not want their children to follow their path, especially if their path was filled with difficulty and problems that they do not want their children to face, so they want to see them do better and have a life without any of the hardship their parents have faced. However, some parents force their children to do extra work in order for them not to face the problems they had and not everyone likes doing extra work. Well, its true that I want my kids to achieve far in life, but I also know that I probably sometimes do a bit too much, says Anonymous 5, a mother of 3. After all, parents expectations come from their care, but even that could be too much for their child. Of course, parents would not mind their kids to get into name brand, great reputation colleges, but that would be up to the child. I do believe that my parents want me to achieve well in life and all, but they sometimes annoy me to no end. says Anonymous 6, a student, I really hate it when Im doing something I, myself, want to do, but then my parents yell at me to do something they want me to do. Their Intentions are good, but they need to know about my own feelings when it comes to their expectations. Teenagers have a lot to say about a wide range of topics, but when it comes to their parents it can be endless. After all, the looming threat of college in the typical teenagers life causes anxiety for both the teen and parent. Unfortunately, that anxiety could lead to a split in the parent and child relationship. Sometimes their expectations are too much for me to do. I do one good thing, but they view more of the bad things I do, says Anonymous 4, another student, Its hard to achieve what they want. I understand them, but I wish they understood me more as well. Their expectations affect my life both in a good way and bad way since it makes me work harder, but leads to me getting a lot of stress and frustrations. After all, do parents truly understand their childrens feelings? Perhaps not. Due to the anxiety to see their children get into college and doing well in their life, some parents do not take the teenagers feelings into consideration. They do expect me to do well in school, and to achieve my goals, but not to do anything I want, says Anonymous 5, Sure, they want me to do what I really want to pursue and become in life, but at times they can be confusing to me. Of course, not all parents expect so much out of their children, but not to the point where expectations are completely lacking. My mom, she doesnt expect me to be perfect, with great grades, 4. 0s, or anything, so we get along fine. I do not find that affects my life that much, although my siblings influence my good grades in school, because I do not want to follow what they did in their lives. Expectations have its ups and downs, but everyone views it differently. My mom expects me to get 4. 0s and to get as many E. As as possible, which I do not find likable. Many times, we argue over the stress of my achieving well and the threat of college, but it usually never ends well. I believe that my life is more stressed and frustrated than before and I am getting tired of it, says Anonymous 6. In the end, parents definitely need to at least try to see if their children are becoming stressed out trying to pass their expectations. However, are expectations from parents really needed? Truthfully, expectations can help improve the mind set of students and their own expectations of doing well for themselves. A lack of expectations might lead to a drop in schoolwork and an allowance of bad grades. Students with uncaring parents might wind up with themselves having low expectations on grades what they expect in life from their parents. Some students believe that their parents expectations really are not needed in their already stressed lives. Well, I could just put my parent’s voices onto a tape recorder and that would be good enough. I hate how they want me to do all this stuff when I just want to do things I really want to do. I find the expectations unneeded in my life because they just add more stress in my life and annoy me to no end, states Anonymous 1. This came from a friend who particularly has a bad relationship with his parents. Some students think that their parents expectations help them, but dislike them at the same time. I think that my parents expectations help me believe that I can do well and it makes me work harder, but sometimes it becomes too much. Because if I do well, my parents expect me to even better and even if I do well in one spot, they look at a bad spot, which is frustrating, tells Anonymous 4. I do think that my parent’s expectations help me make goals in my life, but I hate it. At first, I do think they suck, but I do realize that expectations from my parents are not that bad, it is just that they sometimes expect too much out of me and ticks me off. says Anonymous 6. From this, parents expectations do have an impact on their childrens lives both negatively and positively. In the end, some students wish to deal with their parents expectations, but do not know how to do so. In Elizabeth Ryans, Straight Talk About Parents, she recommends talking to your parents on the rules or chores you have to do and why they bother you. After all, talking aloud with your parents about your problems with their expectations is definitely a start to compromising. She says that if you want to handle these problems, then start by asking yourself: What are the rules in my family? What are the rules do I think are clear to everyone? Which rules do I think are not clear to everyone? What can I do to get the unclear rules to be clearer? Which rules do I think are fair? Which rules do I think are unfair or unnecessary? Which rule am I the most upset about? Think about your parent’s feelings and not just your own, they might only just want the best out of you. Try to make your parents listen to your reasons on why they are bad with their expectations. Instead of always disagreeing and arguing, try to find things to agree on instead of nagging each other. Take note of your own feelings as well as your parents because they might just be taking note of your well-being or future. In case you may not feel like talking to your parents, why not talk to a good friend? Friends should always be there for each other, especially in times of hardship. Talk to your friend about your problems and what they think you should do. If not, just let it out. Yes, crying is human nature and a way of releasing emotion instead of bottling it up. If you’re mad you can just punch the stuffing out of your pillow, you just might find that you feel better after beating your anger out. Hopefully, parents might one day learn how to balance their expectations to not be too much or too little. It might take a while because, after all, parenting is quite the balancing act. Anonymous 1. Personal interview. 25 Jan. 2012. Anonymous 2. Personal interview. 25 Jan. 2012. Anonymous 3. Personal interview. 25 Jan. 2012. Anonymous 4. Personal interview. 25 Jan. 2012. Anonymous 5. Personal interview. 25 Jan. 2012. Anonymous 6. Personal interview. 26 Jan. 2012. Anonymous 7. Personal interview. 26 Jan. 2012. Kazdin, Alan. Why Cant Johnny Jump Tall Buildings? Slate. The Slate Group,   Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  2012. Web. 29 Jan. 2012. http://www. slate. com/articles/life/family/2008/   Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  11/why_cant_johnny_jump_tall_buildings. single. html. Percentage of Children in Grades 6-12 Whose Parents Expect Them To Receive a Bachelors Degree or Higher, 2003 and 2007. Chart. N. p. : Child Trends DataBank, 2007. Childs Trends DataBank. Web. 1 Feb. 2012. http://www. hildtrendsdatabank. org/? q=node/366. Ryan, Elizabeth A. Straight Talk About Parents. New York: New York Facts On File, 1989. Print. Schweitzer, Callie. Taming the Overachieving Monster. Parenting Teens Online. iFOS Publishing and Parenting Teens Network. , Jan. 2008. Web. 27 Jan. 2012. http://www. parentingteensonline. com/article/show/title/ Taming_the_Overachieving_Monster. Shizhen, Lu. Debate: Parental Expectations. China Daily. China Daily,   Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  1995-2012. Web. 29 Jan. 2012. http://www. chinadaily. com. cn/opinion/   Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  2011-05/30/content_12601014_2. htm.